Do Close Relationships Help Us Feel More Secure? A Long-Term Study of Couples Attachment

What is it about?

This study looks at how people’s attachment styles—how secure or insecure they feel in romantic relationships—change over time. Insecure attachment typically takes two forms: anxious attachment, marked by fear of abandonment and a need for constant reassurance, and avoidant attachment, characterized by discomfort with closeness and emotional distance. We followed over 1,000 couples for 20 months to see if attachment anxiety and avoidance decrease, and whether one partner’s development affects the other. We also looked at whether relationship qualities (like satisfaction, commitment closeness, support, disclosure and responsiveness) help people feel more secure over time. We found that women became slightly less anxious, but men didn’t show much change, and attachment avoidance stayed stable. Interestingly, relationship quality didn’t seem to make a big difference overall. This suggests that while some aspects of attachment security may grow over time in long-term relationships, other aspects tend to remain quite stable, regardless of the relationship quality.

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Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

Why is it important?

While it is well established that attachment influences relationship quality, much less is known about how relationship quality, in turn, affects attachment security. This study provides a rare look into the dynamics of romantic relationships by examining how various aspects of relationship quality may shape changes in attachment over time. Uniquely, we use a large, longitudinal sample of couples and include information from both partners simultaneously, offering a dyadic perspective on how attachment develops within relationships.